Mustn't misinterpret what the Doc says.

Hi there.

Day 4. Bad day today.

Let's break it down into the following:

Breakfast: - rolled oats with yoghurt and sultanas.

- orange juice mixed with water.

Lunch: - Nachos

- Strawberry smoothie.

I went out with a friend for lunch.

Second Lunch: (at home where no one can see me) - cheesy chips.

Dinner: - Is going to be the other half of my homemade pizza.

No I didn't eat it last night, because instead, I decided to eat "real" pizza.

I didn't go to the gym. I didn't get up until 8am. Now, fair enough to get up later because I worked last night and got to sleep at 11:30pm. But I didn't go to the gym, because, I'm still sore all over with a massive headache, from a minor accident that happened last night.

I made the effort, to get up, go to class and take notes. To do my interview so I can write an essay. To not cancel on my friend for lunch. But instead of coming home and doing some decent study, I decided to watch the 1st dvd in my 5th season of Charmed. 4 hours, gone. Not dedicated to some decent study. However, my headache is almost gone, so maybe there is a bright side after all.

I started out with good intentions. However, hasn't gone the way I wanted.

Now, with relevance to the title. The Dr. told me yesterday, that if I fall off, to dust myself up and keep trying the next day. However, obviously my brain has interpreted this as "hey go ahead, eat everything non-heathly if you want. Go ahead, go to the shops specifically to buy chips and cheese and the bbq sauce to make this unhealthy lunch. It's alright, we'll start again tomorrow."

I hate that voice. I hate that I have to convince myself otherwise. That I just can't turn that voice off when I need to. Shits me to no end.

Hopefully, tomorrow will be better. I can make it better. Try to. Have faith that I can.

Butterfly kisses,

Rosalinda, xoxo.