Fell Off The Bandwagon

Yep, it happened.

I fell off the bandwagon.

I've started to record what I eat, how much exercise I do, and try to eat healthily overall, but last week I completely fell off, to the floor, and haven't gotten back up. The funny thing is, it always seems to happen when I go to Coffs. Which is strange. It's not like my family has bad eating habits. Mum and Dad generally always cook a healthy meal, (ok Dad cooks, not so much Mum), there's ALWAYS salad in the fridge and cold meat to make sandwiches with. But for some reason, I still eat the crap food.

Partly because my brother and I are as bad as each other. "I feel like Maccas" "We really shouldn't, we don't need it." "I still feel like it." *sigh* "ok let's go."

Typically that is how it is between him and I. One of us will say we feel like junk food, the other one pretty much agrees. I try to be more difficult and not agree, but it never seems to win out. It's not just Macca's either. Last week went something like this.....

Monday - lunchtime: KFC

Tuesday - lunchtime: Pizza

Wednesday - lunchtime: were going to movies so got Hungry Jacks, then popcorn.

Thursday - lunchtime: Chicken and chips from the local chicken store.

Friday - lunchtime: went back to armidale so got KFC.

- dinner: Pizza

Er. Writing it down and looking back on it.... no wonder my body has been sick for the last two days. It's horrible. All the grease and fat used in it. Probably the healthiest option there was the chicken and chips, and even then, it's still deep fried.

So why do I do that? Is it because it's easier? Easier to go pay someone to give me food, rather then make it myself? Probably, but that's because I'm being lazy. And if that was the reason, then why didn't I go to Subway? Healthier option right there, next to KFC. Sure, it's not drive through, but again, that's me being lazy.

Yes, also, it's probably got something to do with the fact that I don't have anyone yelling at me going, "No, No, NOOOO don't you DARE put that shit inside yourself!!" Instead, my brother and I encourage each other to eat badly. Which is bad for both of us. He wants to be a police officer and they have certain requirements to meet before they're let in for training, and at the moment, no way in hell will he be getting in. I want to lose weight, so I feel healthier, better, happier about myself, and because of my genetic history which is prone to diabetes and heart conditions.

My health and weight has suddenly taken the front seat, because I don't want to die young and I want to feel free. I don't feel good about myself. I know people will say, "losing weight doesn't always make you happier" but in this instance, yes, yes it will. I know it will. It makes me happier thinking about doing it. It makes me happier seeing the scales when I've lost even 500gms. It gives me motivation.

So time to hop back on the bandwagon. Tomorrow is Monday. Tomorrow is to start again. Write in my exercise/eating diary. Keep track of what I eat. Keep myself accountable. Don't back down, or "forget" or "I can't be bothered". That type of attitude has gotten me to this point. Time to shift it around.

Rosalinda, xoxo. <3